Fighting the "Yabbuts"

I guess I have blogged about this before a couple of times, and recently, but I ran smack into it again today and felt like saying something. Again.

I am tired of hearing "Yabbuts," okay? "Yabbuts" can save your life - keep you from forgetting your keys or tickets or making a left turn too soon. And sometimes "Yabbuts" are necessary. But they can also keep you from making choices about your life and actually living it! Can you imagine the first hominids who discovered fire if they'd done nothing but listen to their "Yabbuts"? Or what about the first hominids or humans to think it was a good idea to bang together some creaky old wood to float on the water to use as transportation? What would have happened if they'd decided NOT to try to do that? Or what if all those scientists at NASA had listened to their "Yabbuts" - do you think we'd ever have made it to the moon or Mars?

*sigh*

The Perseids are supposed to be in the sky tonight - a meteor shower. They're supposed to be in the sky tonight, tomorrow night and Monday night. I like this stuff and always want to try to see it, but sometimes I miss it for various reasons. Thought I'd try to see them again tonight. You are supposed to view them in the night sky between say 11 pm and 3 am. So, I made a commitment to try to see them.

And then the "Yabbuts" started. You know, there are too many lights in the sky in LA. Where will you go to see them? Which part of the sky is it in?  What if there's cloud cover? Some of the "Yabbuts" were internal (me) and some were external (others).

But, you know, you have a choice in this life. You can either listen to the "Yabbuts" or you can do what you meant to do in the first place. I could have chosen to stay in my stuffy little apartment, where I've been all day in 90-100 degree heat that's barely cooled down, and watched Star Trek and Creature from the Black Lagoon (III) whilst sweating and trying to concentrate on proofreading a book for a client - OR -

I could chose to pour some of the the last of the homemade limoncello into a pretty glass with ice, put my glasses on and gone up to the roof where I sat in the cool breeze, sipped on my little cocktail and enjoyed watching the clouds change from a sleeping cat to a stretching cat to a dragon to a whale and thence to seafoam. I didn't see any meteor showers, but I saw some stars and some airplanes and I'm pretty sure a satellite (I waved) and I had a good time.

All because I didn't listen to the "Yabbuts."

If I had listened to the "Yabbuts" I wouldn't have gone to China the first or second time. I wouldn't have moved to Los Angeles or San Francisco or back to Los Angeles. I wouldn't have kept trying with my writing or submitted any of my work to places to publish. Sure, I'm not in big magazines or with traditional publishers, but my work has been published. And it wouldn't have been published at all if I hadn't tried in the first place. Hell, my father wouldn't have made it to the U.S. as a young immigrant if he'd listened to the "Yabbuts." And then where would I be?

In my interview with Bewildering Stories, I was asked what inspires me. I said at the time - and I still hold to this - other people inspire me. My friends and family inspire me.

I have friends who deal with a lot. Some have kids who are physically disabled or developmentally disabled or are some of the few Latino, Asian or black kids in the classroom or are part of a large family or very small with only one parent. Some have aging or dying parents or partners going through serious sh*t. Some have all of the above. Many are trying to put their kids through college against a lot of odds. Some are taking classes themselves to improve their circumstances. Some are the sole breadwinner for their families. Some are small business owners. Some immigrated to the U.S. for a better life. Some have been fighting unemployment for an inordinate amount of time. Some are the sole advocate when it comes to healthcare and education for their families. Some have physical and emotional and mental and socio-economic battles of their own. Some had to leave California just to get married.

And these friends of mine inspire me because one of the things they have in common is a strong, adventurous spirit. Most of the time when it comes to choices, instead of dwelling on the "Yabbuts" and what they can't do, they look at what they can do. And while the "Yabbuts" are still there to be taken into consideration, they will ultimately choose to look to what they can do instead of focusing on what they can't do. Then, without nattering on about things they can't do anything about, they do.

That's inspiring. That's OLYMPIAN inspiring. You think those athletes sit around all day thinking about what they can't do and what's holding them back? No. They look at what they can do and then they do it.

When I was in grade school my mom sent me to YMCA day camp, and later on sleepover camp, every year. The sleepover camp was called YOLC - or Youth Outdoor Leadership Camp. The motto: "Can't is not a word because it's not in the dictionary." Maybe I was indoctrinated by them. Maybe it was my dad, my mom, and my gramma actually telling me what I could do rather than what I couldn't do. (My grampa was definitely part of the "Yabbuts" school and was more about what you can't do when I knew him - but when he was younger - he was all about what he could do.) I don't know.

I just know that whenever I run into a bunch of "Yabbuts" I get suspicious, impatient and pissed. And it makes me determined to do what I set out to do that much more and leave the "Naysayers" and "Yabbuts" far far behind.

FIGHT THE "YABBUTS"!