Are You Searching for Love (Writers Critique Groups) in All the Wrong Places?

Crossposted from Blogetary:

First off, I do not promise to be the end all/be all authority on writers critique and/or support groups. But I’ve been to a few and I was a vice president of a small neighborhood group for a few years. I’ve been on the look out for critique partners as well as writers support groups and workshop groups and been involved with ones that worked and ones that didn’t work for me. Recently, I’ve either read about the search and/or necessity for writers groups (or not) and as well as spoken with people who have been vastly disappointed about the experiences they had with turning to fellow writers for help and critique.

So, I’m going to say what I read somewhere else years ago that has put me in good stead in seeking (and finding) good writers critique/support partners/groups. Just relax and enjoy the search because it’s a lot like dating. Just like dating, you’ll run into egotistical and insufferable jerks, and just like dating, you’ll run into those nice people that you want things to work out with, but it just doesn’t ever quite work out for you. And then sometimes, just like dating, you actually run into someone, or maybe a few someones, who work out for you. Sometimes it works out just for the short term and other times in the long term, either way, the critique and help you get from these people is to be treasured. I wish I could remember what writer’s blog I found my help on, but these are some of the tips I remember from it and have found useful in looking for (and being in) a writers group or a critique partner.

Of course the first rule, above all else (and I do remember where this came from): Be kind, be kind, be kind. I remember reading that first rule at least 20 years ago in Writing Down the Bones by Natalie Goldberg. Being kind doesn’t mean being “soft” or not pointing out what needs to be worked on. It does mean making sure that you point out the positive as well as the negative aspects of a piece of work. And that when you do point out the negative aspects, it is in an objective and constructive manner. It is not a time to rip things to shreds, make anything personal or be mean. You’re trying to help this other writer become a better writer, not tear them down so bad they end up rocking back and forth in the bathtub for a week.

Critique Partners
1) Compare types of writing. Do you and your prospective critique partners write in similar genres and work in similar areas? You don’t have to, but it can help. Are you a romance writer and the person you’re going to trade manuscripts with a horror writer? It might work. If there are aspects of a specific manuscript that you think the horror writer can address, then at least for that one manuscript, it could be a good match. Or if you like reading horror and they like reading romance, then you’ll probably be fine. But if you don’t like horror and they don’t like romance, it probably won’t work. If you’re going to work with someone else over the rocky road to a hopefully publishable manuscript then you have to at least enjoy the type of writing they do. On the other hand, you don’t want to both be working on types of stories that are so similar that it fosters a competitive spirit that might get in the way of being an object reader of someone else’s manuscript. And it also helps if you’re both going to be working on the same types of writing (novels, short stories, scripts, screenplays, poetry, etc.)

2) Compare your WIPs (Works in Progress). I don’t mean in one of those “So, what have you got there?” ways. I mean take a good, honest objective look at your writing. And then when you look at their writing, take an equally, honest and objective look. If it feels like you are fairly equal when it comes to where you are in your writing level/ability/talent (I’m afraid whatever I say here will spark someone on a discussion on what all that means and I’m trying to bypass that), then proceed. Sometimes that’s hard to judge or we feel unfair when we make the judgment, but if you feel like things are not equal when it comes to where you are in your writing – then if you feel like they are leaps and bounds ahead of you ask for help. Ask them to look at your WIP and see what they say and then move on and find a more equitable partner. If it’s the other way around just remember the above and be kind, be kind, be kind. Offer constructive criticism. Look for the good. And move on to look for a more equitable partner.

3) What is it you want to get out this partnership? Do you want someone who will catch every single mistake you’ve made? Or are you looking for someone who will read and give you general feedback? Or something in between? Are you both going to the same place with your writing? Is it a hobby for one or both of you or serious business? Do you want to meet weekly? Biweekly? Monthly? Every couple of months? Everyone has a different schedule and a different goal, so it’s important with critique partners, just as in dating, that they understand where and what the other person wants and if it’s similar to what the other wants.

Writers Support Groups
1) What do you want out of going to a writers group? Sit down and figure it out. Do you want light support and camaraderie so you don’t feel so alone out there in the world while you’re trying to write? Do you want substantive critique? What is it you’re looking for? Write it down and keep a look out for groups that sound like what you are looking for. Are you looking for a free group, are you willing to pay dues or are you looking more for a “class” group, a workshop where you might end up paying more money?

2) What is the focus of the group? You’ve found a group. Great! Now, is the focus of the group in line with where you are with your writing? Sometimes a group is there just for support, to talk about the ups and downs of writing, share the victories and sorrows of attacking a book, and maybe share some of what each person has written. Sometimes most of the people in the group are hobbyists, they just pen the occasional verse or essay. Sometimes the focus of the group is pure workshop critique, down to business. Sometimes it’s in between. Nothing is right or wrong, but you have to decide what works for you and what you are looking for in a group (see above) and look for that. If you’re just getting into writing or back into writing after a long time away, maybe what you need is a pure support group to hear about other people’s journeys in the writing world. Maybe you want more of a workshop group. The point is, don’t complain about a group that doesn’t work for you. Look at what you gain from it. If what you gain outweighs what you don’t like about the group, then stick with it and get as much as can out of it until you find a group that is a better fit. (And remember this group is supposed to help you in your writing journey, so don’t use it as a reason to procrastinate.) If you are not gaining anything, then move on. The group doesn’t need you if you are going to pull them down with dissatisfaction and it’s not going to help you either to stick with a group that you don’t like being a part of anyway.

3) If you can’t find a group then put one together yourself. Yep, that’s right. Wrangle together your writer friends (you know who they are) and start your own group. Figure out what you want it to do and want it to accomplish, how often you’d like to meet, and start it up. Appoint a leader or two, but use consensus when making group decisions. I would suggest once a month at first, maybe on a Saturday or Sunday at a coffee shop or a home. Make it always the third Saturday or second Wednesday at a certain time. It might take a while for it get off the ground, but if enough people are like minded, then you’ll limp along long enough until you realize one day that your little group has been helping each other with their writing endeavors for a number of years and that you have probably accomplished more than you thought with your own writing along the way.
If you are a writer, then you know that this is something you are involved with for the long haul. You understand that writing is not just a way of gaining “passive income” through some fantabulous book deal. Those fantabulous book deals or self-published e-books that take off like wild fire are few and far between. So, if you know you are in this for the long haul, don’t try to do it all alone. There are other writers out there and it’s good that we find each other and help each other out. In the end, it will help us become better writers.

Last note - on the Blogetary blog a friend pointed out another thing to watch out for is that sometimes critique groups can become like high school cliques. And then all sorts of things can happen like picking on someone's work rather than being objective or trashing someone's work rather than being constructive.